Romaine Calm.
It’s what you say when you are absolutely not calm but refuse to give the situation the satisfaction.
This vegetable pun sticker is for people who have mastered the art of looking composed while mentally drafting three exit strategies and a strongly worded email. It’s a funny food pun sticker with just enough “keep calm” parody to feel intentional, not naive.
It sticks to laptops, water bottles, notebooks, car bumpers — anywhere that could benefit from a small, judgmental head of lettuce overseeing events. Printed on waterproof vinyl, it survives rain, coffee spills, gym bags, and the emotional weather of group projects.
If you collect food pun stickers or prefer your vegetable humor dry, sharp, and slightly feral, this one earns its place.
Not inspirational.
Not soothing.
Just a calm face on a situation that is absolutely not calm.
Lettuce pretend.
